Fatigue :/ Tuesday, Aug 25 2009 

I’m not sure if it’s the stress, the heat, or what, but I can’t seem to shake being so damned tired all the time.

There’s nothing like trying to pack a truck full of gear when all you want to do is take a nap – for like, the next ten years.

Aaron just thinks it’s the doctor thing.

…I just realized I forgot to mention him before, and you guys probably don’t know me from Adam…

Ok, Aaron’s my long term boyfriend – we live together and all that. It beats the hell out of having a roommate that’s just a fly by night, and we have a pretty comfortable one bedroom. (Well, it WAS comfortable before the air conditioning broke, anyway.)

I wasn’t sure how my parents would take the ‘living in sin’ dealio…so we haven’t told them, just yet. You couldn’t drag my Dad anywhere NEAR the city without kicking and screaming, so he hasn’t visited me yet. Last time Mom came down, I was living with five other girls – in an apartment laughingly called a two bedroom with a loft. The loft was actually built over one of the other bedrooms; there was a ladder up to my ‘room’ – which fit an air mattress and had three feet vertically. Yeah, I was living in a storage closet that they were calling a bedroom.

She knows I moved, just not that one teeny (ok, maybe not so teeny, he’s six feet tall) detail. We’re going to have to deal with that soon…


How Embarassing… Friday, Aug 21 2009 

I stopped in the gas station tonight to buy cigarettes and cookies (the cure for all emotional ills).

The shorts I was wearing were maybe a leeetle short for my build…sue me, it’s been insanely hot. Even hiding in the house all day and only showing my face after sunset, it’s hot.

Been incredibly tired, I think it’s the heat.

Anyhow, I noticed a couple of guys staring at my tuchus. I thought all those squats and lunges were finally starting to pay off…

Until I got home and realized there was a HUGE rip in the back of my shorts. Like big enough that the whole back pocket area was blowin’ in the wind. Sigh. So my huge pasty butt was saying ‘hi’ to the world!

At least I was wearing clean underwear.

So, the cream is working Wednesday, Aug 19 2009 

Thank God!

The swelling on my face is going down a little – I thought I’d be stuck looking like Quasimodo on a bender forever. Oy. So thank you, wonderful dermatologist lady.

It kinda sucks because I took the week off from work because I’d be out in this field all day, and I want the chance for my face to calm down. I really need the money, but I was/am worried that ANY exposed skin is going to start to look like that.

I had quit smoking about a month ago, but this whole thing has me so bugged…so much for that. On the plus side, one ciggy makes me dizzy. Right now, dizzy is just great.

And the people at the grocery store think I’m nuts. (Not that they probably didn’t beforehand…) So, I’m just there for toothpaste and razors – and there’s this display of a new sunscreen, spf 85! I was about ready to plotz from the diagnosis, so this looks like just the thing. (Yeah, I’ve heard that anything more than 35 is a waste, but…)

Anyway, the girl at the register looks at me like I’m a total shlemeil (I bought six bottles). Hey – I don’t peek into your basket, just ring me up already.

Hopefully, this stuff will do the trick.

Introduction Monday, Aug 17 2009 

I started this blog because I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m turning into a vampire.  Sounds ridiculous right?  Try being on the other end, and wondering if you’re either going mad, or some particularly intense hypochondriac.  By the way, it’s not fun.  Everything that’s happened so far pretty much, well, sucks.

I figure I can’t be the only one having these problems, that would be too weird.

Anyway, here’s the lowdown about me, and how all this weirdness started.

My name is Elizabeth Shwartz.  I’ll answer to Liz.  You’d best watch all your soft and sensitive parts if you call me Beth.  I just hate that name.  Well, I’m not wild about my name altogether, but that’s part of being upfront, right?  I coulda picked something cool, but then you wouldn’t believe me about the rest of what’s going on.

I am (or was) a short Jewish girl living in the ‘burbs around NYC, struggling to have a career in entertainment.  No, I’m not an actress – not with this dumpy bod and mush-face :).  I’m a film and theater electrician, and pretty darn good at it – not that it makes much difference.  Did a lot of outdoor summer theater and arena shows – fresh air, exersize, sunshine (rain and mud, too).  Fun people…

I actually thought the problem came from some of the locations I end up in when doing independent film – you end up in a lot of dank basements, atticks, unused and forgotten spaces.  They’re full of spiders, junk, grime, and God knows what else, so I thought I’d caught something nasty.

The something nasty was messing up my face.  Now, I’m no supermodel or anything, but I’d always had a really clear complexion.  That makes up for a lot, when you’ve got limited assets to work with.  Whatever it was, was ruining my face like nobody’s business.

It started out as just some redness.  Eh, I can live with that.  Then came what I thought were zits.  Looked kinda like zits, but they never went away!  And kept multiplying.  At first, it was just one red bump on my right cheek.  By the time I went to the doctor, I had these big scaly, bumpy (like an inch off my face) breakouts, and my nose was so puffy and red I looked like a career drinker.  Which I’m not – but try explaining that to a new crew when they take one look at you and then mention that drinking on the job isn’t allowed.

That’s what finally sent me to the doctor.  I’m not particularly vain, but the whole losing work thing is just not cool.

I spent the whole afternoon at the dermatologists, waiting for them to figure out what was wrong with me.  The nurse practitioner came back in after the last battery of tests, to inform me that I’m allergic to sunlight.

What the hell?  Never had a problem before, and what are you supposed to do about that?

They gave me some creams, told me to stay out of the sun.  And that was how it all started.